Pertinent Query – 1


Why is it that BJP always asks for a balance sheet of congress performance from 1947 onwards – or more accurately of 60 years of congress rule? I think Congress came into being around 1885 and so did Hindu Mahasabha [maybe around 1914-15] or RSS [founded in 1920’s]. Now if congress was founded around 1885 then would not be more meaningful to ask about their performance since inception?

Let’s say if congress decides to present a performance card, as BJP continuously ask, I am sure it will be a sheet comprising of lot of bad things as well as good things. Let’s say if congress decide to present such a balance sheet since inception then I am sure it will be account of lot of good things and some bad things.

I think congress should present this balance sheet and so should BJP. I am also sure that just like for congress, for BJP it will not be a pleasant accounting exercise. But I am interested in knowing which one do you think will find it more unpleasant? Congress or BJP??

Sir I was not at the crime scene. Crime scene came to my door.


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Science tells us that Moon doesn’t have life.

But that’s Science. Senior police inspector Ramlal argues otherwise, “Science & Scientist are liars. Truth is that there is life on Moon. In-fact moon has a fully fledged civilization”

Well, I will go by Ramlal. He has defeated science many a times. Every time science argued that finger prints on the knife with which victim was killed is not of accused, Ramlal has always managed to come out a winner; that is “accused is guilty”. No point going in details; hook or crook Ramlal is far better than science.

That’s Ramlal for you; his argument on life on moon is also extremely simple, “Science & scientists are only aware about the brighter side of the moon. They don’t know what’s on the other side. It is on the other side that a fully fledged civilization is flourishing.”

Well, I will again take Ramlal’s side. After all, Ramlal is expert in investigating the darker side of crime scene. In-fact he has a unique style of functioning. Other day he was investigating a murder case. During investigation he asked a junior hawaldar, “BHAI, it’s a murder case. In such cases we must collect solid evidence. Correct?”

Hawaldar, “Well! Sir we’ll have to catch hold of the murderer first. Only then we will start collecting evidence. Correct sir?”

Ramlal, “No that’s the wrong way hawaldar. Collect evidence first. Did you find any blood stains? Blood stains on anyone’s clothes?”

Hawaldar, “Sir, the man who shot the victim ran away. Victim was lying on the street. A bystander picked the victim and brought him to the hospital. There are blood stains on bystander’s clothes”

Ramlal, “Arrest him !!”

Hawaldar, “no no he didn’t do anything, he just helped the victim”

Ramlal, “that’s ok. But where else will you go to find blood stains? Hawaldar always remember collect whatever evidence you can collect. We will connect the dots later.”

So Hawaldar arrested the onlooker and brought him in front of Ramlal. “What were you doing at the crime scene?”

Passerby, “sir, I did not go to the crime scene. Actually, Victim was shot dead in front of my house”

Ramlal, “well you have a house is ok. But why were you at the crime scene?”

Passerby, “Sir I was not at the crime scene. Crime scene came to my door. You understand what I mean?”

& this continued for a while. Ramlal further explained the whole process of investigation to hawaldar, “See, a man has been killed and that’s for sure. Now if a man has been killed obviously there is someone who has killed him. So someone needs to be nabbed. Someone must be produced in the court as accused. It is not important who that is till the time you can connect the dots & prove your case. Rest is for court to decide. And always remember, all men are equal. Who are we to differentiate?”

Hawaldar, “but sir how fair is it to punish someone who has not committed the crime?”

Ramlal, “What did I just tell you. All men are equal & must be treated as equals. All are sons of God. Whether you end up punishing a guilty or otherwise, it is God who will be hanged. Your conscious is clear; did you not find blood stains on his clothes? Now, where will you find another one with blood stains? Your job is to file an F.I.R”

CONDITION SERIOUS HOTI JA RAHI HAI. Now in my next post we will see how Ramlal will prove the case in the court.

Sir I was not at the crime scene. Crime scene came to my door – Part 2.


यह किस्से तुम्हारे ही हैं

Ramlal’s shrewd explanation that all men are equal & it doesn’t matter who goes to the gallows because it’s the same god who is being hanged every time left Hawaldar bewildered. Ramlal continued, “now that you have collected evidence and also have suspect, followed by a FIR what is going to be your next step?”

Hawaldar, “well I would say, maybe, convincing the judge that suspect has committed the crime?”

Ramlal, “Absolutely; and for that you need eyewitnesses. Do you know who’s an eyewitness; not who has seen but who will say that he has seen!”

Hawaldar, “why would anyone do that?”

Ramlal, “what kind of question is that hawaldar? How long you have been with the department? You should always have a list of eyewitnesses. Use it when you want to use & the way you want to use. I have a pool of 10-15 eyewitnesses who witness at-least…

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Sir I was not at the crime scene. Crime scene came to my door – Part 2.


Ramlal’s shrewd explanation that all men are equal & it doesn’t matter who goes to the gallows because it’s the same god who is being hanged every time left Hawaldar bewildered. Ramlal continued, “now that you have collected evidence and also have suspect, followed by a FIR what is going to be your next step?”

Hawaldar, “well I would say, maybe, convincing the judge that suspect has committed the crime?”

Ramlal, “Absolutely; and for that you need eyewitnesses. Do you know who’s an eyewitness; not who has seen but who will say that he has seen!”

Hawaldar, “why would anyone do that?”

Ramlal, “what kind of question is that hawaldar? How long you have been with the department? You should always have a list of eyewitnesses. Use it when you want to use & the way you want to use. I have a pool of 10-15 eyewitnesses who witness at-least 200-300 crimes in a year. & believe it or not even courts accept their statements. After all we are from the land of SANJAY, an advisor to the king with gift of seeing events at a distance. Do you know who to create a pool of eyewitnesses?”

Hawaldar, “how?”

Ramlal, “get me a group of 2-3 rag-pickers, about 5-6 drug peddlers and a few thugs”

Next morning, 9 gems were there in Ramlal’s court, courtesy Hawaldar.

Ramlal, “did you see this man brutally beat-up victim to death?”

9 Gems hesitantly, “No sir, we were not there” They were not sure what was better for them; agreeing or disagreeing

Ramlal, “I agree you were not there, but that’s not what I am asking. Listen carefully. You saw this man lynch victim to death?”

9 gems thought Ramlal has gone mad, what else could be the reason for his gobbledygook. 1 of them even laughed.

Ramlal, “don’t laugh. Please answer”

9 gems, “Sir we were not there. How do you expect us to see what happened when we were not there?”

Ramlal shouted, “Did you see this man lynch victim to death? Either say yes or you thugs will be in jail. Choose quickly”

9 gems, “yes sir, this man came out of his house got in a scuffle with victim, lynch him to death”

Ramlal, “Good. Do you think you can support me by being at other crime scenes also? I mean a permanent eyewitness?”

9 gems, “sure sir. We will ensure full co-operation.”

Hawaldar was speechless. He quickly recorded statements, started to understand how to connect the dots.

A watertight case was presented in the court. Courts issued its verdict. Onlooker was found guilty of the crime & was sent to gallows.

CONDITION SERIOUS HOTI JA RAHI HAI. In my next post we will see the consequences of the verdict

3 Wise Souls: Part IV : Beginning of Destruction


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Queen did not pay heed to villagers demand. Back in the prison Dharma asked Science

Dharma: you are mightiest of all, miracle man of new world. I am sure you can help us get free with just one stroke of might ways

Science: (to Dharma): Remember Dharma I told you at the start as well. I do not have my own free will. I do what is being told by my master. Till few months back you two (art & Dharma) were my masters & I did as you directed. Now my master is deceitful Politics. It is her wish which is now my command. & her wish is that should remain silent onlooker while her tactics & plots continue to unfold.

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Queen (politics) continued her trickery. One of her best tricks was to ensure complete ban on free & independent thoughts. No one was allowed to think, no one was anymore allowed to have a distinct opinion. Her committees started a campaign around hatred, violence in name of patriotism. Oppression was taught as valor & gallantry.

Then one day she called for a mass meeting. She made it mandatory for each villager to attend. She then gave her most important & famous sermon

Queen: You are living in extreme penury. What you call contentment is actually an illusion. What you think is renouncement is your incapability. What you call peace is sluggishness. Look around you. Look at your neighbors. See how prosperous they are. Look at the luxury they are enjoying. They have heavy gold reserves. Attack them, plunder their wealth, win their territory, their cattle & make all that they have justifiably yours.

Village Surpanch: But this lust for what is not ours is not a good virtue. Dharma, the great soul, taught us all?

Queen: you are fool just like Dharma is. Live by the sword and everything will be yours. Land, cattle, gold, luxury & everything else that you can think of is up for grabs. One’s might decide who the owner is.

Villagers: but our neighbors are stronger.

Queen: You have science. It’s just that you have never unleashed his power. It is now time.

She then summoned Science. Dutifully Science obliged. Neighbors were demolished; screams everyplace; dead bodies everywhere; blood & destruction all around.

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What happened next? In fact if I can ask what do you think what will happen next?

3 Wise Souls: Part III : Queen’s Supremacy


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With Queen ruling the roost & art, dharma and science her prisoners; life of villagers started to change. For villagers three wise souls were their guiding source, solace in time of unease & educators that always guided them on the right path.

One day villagers gathered at the palace gate & collectively requested the queen (politics) to release three wise souls.

Queen (Politics): You are all mistaken. How can I even think of detaining three wise souls? I am their humble servant; just like you all are. For me they are my GURUS. But it is important for us to give them some rest as well. All three have been tirelessly working for the village since time immemorial. All I have done is requested them to take some rest for a few days. To regain lost health, soon they will back with you all.

For Villagers this assurance was enough. Soon their guides will be back with them. They returned back with hope of meeting three wise souls soon.

Time passed & when patience ran out, villagers again gathered in front of the palace. They requested the Queen (politics) again

Queen (politics): Let them rest. It is not important for you to have direct interaction with them. In-fact to manage individual needs we now have a full force of trained royal guards who have been trained by the three wise souls. These royal guards are equally capable of showing you the path. Why don’t you ask your queries, clear your doubts & seek advice from these royal guards. Three wise souls are extremely busy solving bigger issues of state craft”

So Royal guards took over; but as expected these royal committees were no match.

Royal Art Committee spread lust, despondency, and frustration, no imagination, lost spirit

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Royal Dharma committee broadcast hypocrisy, pomp and hatred

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Royal Science committee preached violence, war craft & vengeance

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Villagers soon realized that these committees were not teaching what three wise souls stood for. They could not tolerate this gimmickry anymore.  They again gathered at the palace gate & out of disgust demanded release of three wise souls. The only difference this time was that not all villagers were demanding this. Some who got lured by committee’s propaganda changed sides

What happened next? Oops!! Sorry but how about waiting till tomorrow

3 Wise Souls : Part II : Emergence of the Queen


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So for next day onward, politics started following Art, Dharma & science. Stealing an unguarded moment she started what came naturally to her, gazing at innocent villagers & trying to charm them with her appearance.  She had high desire, wanted wealth, desired grand & opulent life.

Trickery came next & as time passed her sensational impression helped her reach the top seat of power. She was crowned as Village Queen.

When the news reached three wise souls, they said, “Good news! She was destined to rule.”

Nothing much changed in the life of villagers as well as three wise souls. The newly crowned queen & her influence remained confined to her palace. Villagers continued with their normal routine & continued to consult three wise souls in all matters pertaining to their well being. Politics didn’t like that much.

Like trickery she was an expert in diplomacy. She sent a messenger to bring three wise souls to her palace.

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Messenger (to three wise souls): Sirs, her majesty wishes to see you all at her palace. She sent me to escort you all.

Art: Messenger! We are commoner. What will we do in a palace? We belong here

Messenger: Queen is one of your old servant (oops! I mean disciple). She sent me to invite you all with folded hands for an evening in palace

Dharma (to art): always remember, one should always accept an invitation received from old disciple. Messenger is insisting and we must honour that. Let’s go

So Art, Dharma & Science along with messenger reached Queen’s palace. Queen immediately ordered their arrest. All three wise souls were immediately arrested & moved to high security state guest house; house arrest.

SO WHAT HAPPENED NEXT? that’s in the next post.

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3 Wise Souls : Part 1 : Introduction


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Once upon a time in a far away village lived three wise souls. It is believed that the village was blessed with the wise souls by the God himself; that these souls were a gift they earned through their pious virtues. No one knows since how long these three wise souls were living in the village. What is known is that they were since time immemorial, ever-present. What is also known is that they were the primary reason for village’s prosperity.

One of the wise souls was female while the other two were male

Her name was – art. She had an attractive figure, glossy skin, slender eyebrows, velvety eyelashes, elegant nose, shiny white teeth, varnished fingernails, molten red hair or better ebony black hair, rapture blue eyes, syrup sweet lips & an extremely joyous personality. Her voice was soothing.

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One of the two men was – Dharma meaning what is established or firm & hence law, order, duty, custom. As the name suggest Dharma was an old white bearded man with loads of experience & always righteous, most respected almost like the almighty.

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The third soul was – Science; the increasingly powerful, logical & myth-buster. Science had some mind-blowing hymns (MANTRA), using which he could light up the village during nights. He always worked on the directions of art & dharma. He had no free will. Even if he had any he never exercised that free will. The ever helpful science relentlessly worked towards making life of the villagers easy through his inventions & discoveries.

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So the three souls were living in that village & village was prosperous & full of joy.

Then one day another soul entered the scene. She came straight to the three wise souls and pleaded with folded hands, “my name is politics. It is my wish to stay along with you three & serve the people of this village”

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Art: we live in tough conditions. Our purpose is to live for others, to serve

Politics: & I want to join the cause. I have my own character; I provide system, rules, and regulations. I am the only source for order.

Dharma: everyone in this village is dutiful, high on morals. Everyone lives for everyone else. There is already order, system in the village.

Art: At the same time, look at your demeanor. You are shrewd & clever. You are full of impatience. You come across as totally untrustworthy & your manner exhibits crookedness.

Dharma:  Thirst for wealth can’t co-exist with principal of self-sacrificing service. You are not made for this politics

Science: I don’t have eyes. But I have other senses. I can smell greed & deceit as your primary characters. Are you sure you want to be a part of our “Self-sacrificing Service mission?”

Politics: (started crying): I had only one aim in my life; to work with three wise souls. All I want is a chance. Fair chance is my right. But it seems that you three will not allow me to be part of Service mission. Seems you have monopolize the area of “Service”

Dharma: (well aware of her theatrics): you are mistaken politics. No one is trying to corner you. It is just that basis our assessment of your character we are trying to explain you that you are not made for self-sacrificing service. But if you insist let us give you a chance. You can live with us for a period of 3 days

So what happened next…?

(Well! I am feeling sleepy now. Will continue tomorrow….)…. Let me know if you would want to know “what happened next?”

Naxalism: above all remember, “YOU NEVER RECEIVED THIS MESSAGE”


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But just before we start with Ramlal’s letter, I know Part V of three Wise souls is pending, and that is scheduled for tomorrow.

I have just realized that RAMLAL’s prophesy on election dates in RED CORRIDOR has come true. Election TAMASHA in RED CORRIDOR is planned between April 9th and April 18th. He has just received a letter from his mentor. He now has to make copies of that message and circulate it across his area of influence. An open letter for Comrades titled, “How to conduct during GREAT ELECTION TAMASHA.” Here’s the transcript

Comrades! Great Indian Election TAMASHA is back & the dates finalized by Indian state to conduct this gimmickry in Red corridor are between 9th April and 18th April.

The corporate controlled media is preparing its schedule; is finalizing their team of journalists who will be soon seen along with some INDIAN politicians around RED CORRIDOR’s borders (obviously they can’t dare enter deep in our territory). Politicians will generously offer bags of grains, mosquito repellents, chloroquine tablets that help us fight malaria.

Some politicians will offer never-heard buying rates for TENDU leaves as well. There are rumors that for each PURA (a bunch of around 70 tendu leaves is called puri & a pack of 100 such puri s is called pura) which is generally sold at Rs 175-200 politicians will offer as high as Rs. 400.

As for media houses you already know what they will be doing. Politicians will claim that lots have been done for our betterment over the years & media will make special reports. Some of you will be asked to pose with Rs. 500 note with a footnote –“TRIBALS BEING PAID RS. 400 PER PURA”

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You know media has been functioning as propaganda arm of the Indian state; and will again be showing “FREE & FAIR ELECTION TAMASHA” on respective channels.

Between these reports & especially during prime time slots you will also witness heavy advertisement from corporate houses. We know who they are; well known imperialists on whose directives INDIA STATE runs its policies.

We do not expect Media to show the blatant loot of rich mineral resources in our motherland that they call Chhattisgarh, Jharkhand & Orrisa. The propaganda efforts are geared to hide this connection between imperialist loot and war on its own people.

Comrades! Treat this as merry time. It is your time to LOOT. Take whatever is on offering with both arms. Do not refuse anything; whosoever agrees for a better rate vote for them. & above all remember, “YOU NEVER RECEIVED THIS MESSAGE”

Naxalism: “Great Indian Election Tamasha”


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Ramlal’s ‘Red Corridor’ (the Naxal stronghold) is expected to go to poll first. Home ministry has suggested that polling in “difficult” areas like Ramlal’s villages in Chhattisgarh, his father in law’s region of Jharkhand & his distant relatives in Odisha be conducted in the initial phase.

While this will allow Home ministry maximum concentration of central forces; Ramlal I am sure is equally prepared. It is his “for the people, by the people & of the people” that is called government in these regions.

While I don’t care whether Election commission will oblige or not, Ramlal & Political parties sure are interested in what will finally emerge; though for different reasons.

Ramlal’s “Red Corridor” has good concentration of Christians. Political parties understand (fairly well actually!!) the importance of festivities & its defining impact on vote shares, last minute swings etc. April 18th is Good Friday & April 20th is Easter. They are planning to dole out freebies; Ramlals of “Red Corridor” are expecting Cows, goats, grain. Freebies are a fact of life in Indian politics, and items like livestock are only part of it.

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Just before Good Friday, i.e. on 13th & 14th Some parts of Red Corridor will be busy celebrating Baisakhi, before which around 8th April tribals will be busy rejoicing birth of Lord RAM (Ramnavmi). By the way don’t forget Bihu which is highly popular among tribal (mid April). Just 4 days before Good Friday coinciding with Baisakhi will be baba’s jayanthi (Ambedkar’s birthday).

Political parties obviously will dole out. That’s already done & dusted. The only obstacle is that while all festivals are falling in April, election’s first phase is expected in first week of April. May good sense prevail and Election commission decides to conduct polling in these areas in second phase. Poor tribal will gain from “Great Indian Election Tamasha”

Ramlal has a bigger issue to tackle. He is sure that polling is going to happen in second phase. He is busy training his carders on how to propagate across the territory that all Ramlals of “Red Corridor” must accept all the freebies. They must also vote in exchange of the freebies. This is merry time & must be used to the fullest. His problem is that Ramlals of “Red corridor” are so loyal & committed to common cause of “liberation” that they are expected to throw away all freebies.

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Ramlal’s message to his fellow Ramlals is, “Don’t worry. You know you already have a democratic government. But if some fools wants to conduct some funny elections let them. This is merry time comrades. Political jokers will come; they will spend; they will offer freebies. Accept them all.”

Politics : Lies, damned lies, and statistics


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Ramlal’s NANAJEE (maternal grandfather) had this unique manner of explaining tough concepts. For some his satire was simple outstanding. He once told Ramlal that for majority of people principles are like gold jewellery. Just like gold jewellery is for weddings, festivities and special occasion one should talk about principles occasionally, say couple of times a year. For rest of the days as jewellery is for lockers; safe and sound, so should be principles. That’s the way of politics. That’s the way to success.

Obviously Ramlal was too young to understand. But now that Ramlal is in his late thirty’s he has some appreciation of the world around him. He now has a fair understanding that we currently have a self-professed progressive government at the center, so committed to BHARAT NIRMAN that it is spending more than 400 crore on advertisement handouts. What for? Just to reiterate its progressiveness.

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Ramal is equally aware of another 500 crore spend by challenger; another self professed ‘development messiah’ who has repeatedly lost his face on account of raping the secular structure of our country; presiding over the mass murder on communal ground. But then as they say, ‘CHODO KAL KI BAATAIN KAL KI BAAT PURANI’ (loosely translated in English as forget the past, that’s gone by)

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Anyways as the rumors about on airtime being leased, front page of newspaper being bought, media house’s collaboration with political parties, started making rounds Ramlal, wisely though, decided that he will devote equal amount of time for each party. Hence, impartially he devotes a day to a party, party sponsored advertisements & party sponsored news. He thinks that this is the only way through which he will get a fair understanding of each party’s view & counter-view.

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He followed his routine for a while. Here’s what Ramlal now understands about India’s current situation.

What he gets sure about on Mon-Wed & Fri?

Our prime minister is simply the finest example of a man who came to office with an impeccable track record and will now without question leave with his reputation irreparably damaged. His integrity; 2G spectrum scam, the coal block allocation & Antrix-devas deal, all scams that lead directly to his doorstop; is now questionable. His ‘coalition dharma’ remark makes him & his corrupt party  a no-option in the current election

& alternatively

UPA’s BHARAT NIRMAN dream has more-or-less come true. Primarily because of impeccable policy execution & sheer commitment to fulfill all promises that party made in last lok sabha elections.

On Sundays

India’s only hope is group of ‘clean’ candidates. Some of them working professionals, others with exemplary work records (either in corporate or social/public sectors) are preparing for lok sabha elections. This is the middle-class opportunity to seize the day.

It is increasingly getting confusing for Ramlal who just refuses to go with tide and insist on facts. As for facts RAMLAL’s NANAJI (wise old man) has another adage which goes like this, “Lies, damned lies, and statistics”

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Keyword : Sex : most sought after on the internet


Ramlal is inquisitive beyond imagination. As the New Year is crack of dawn away, Ramlal ‘the curious one’ tried to ask the new age god “GOOGLE” yesterday night, “What is it that his brothers and sisters in India searched for the most in the year gone by?”

And as always, “GOOGLE –THE REAL GOD” obliged with more than 10,000 results within 0.4 sec. This is what popped up; It’s “Sunny Leone” and not “PM Modi” that is most sought after on the internet; both literally as well as metaphorically.

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This piece of information did not come as a surprise to Ramlal. I think he always knew that, Modi is a search keyword for “mental jerk off” while Sunny Leone is what you need when it comes to “pocket pool” in those moment of privacy.

What confused Ramlal was the next piece of information. The most sought after keyword on Internet for Indians is “sex”& not “Love”. Please do not misunderstand his confusion. He is not confused how Sex can be more searched than Love. Ramlal is wondering that what the difference between the two is? Considering that majority of Indians use these two as synonyms I think Ramlal’s confusion has merit.IMG-20141220-WA0003

So he then tried multiple search strings to find out the difference. One result differentiated the two as, “While love is a feeling, sex is an act”. The other set them apart as “there is no exact “right” definition of Love while all kinds of sex have some things in common and hence easy to define”

Ramlal wants to start his new year with clarity. Do you know what is the difference between Sex & love?

Is there anything wrong in voting for these reasons; instant cash; quick favor & few evenings full of free drinks and CHICKEN TIKKA?


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Aadya who is 10 years old lives with her parents and an older sister Aanandi in Delhi, India. Aadya’s father works in a firm specializing in analytics. Aadya’s parents met at college. For a few years her mother worked in publishing, but when aanandi was born she decided to concentrate on raising a family. Now that both aadya and aanandi attend school she does voluntary work. The family lives in a three storey house. It has four bedrooms, two bathrooms, a large drawing cum dining room and a modern kitchen.

Aadya’s father and his firm jointly contribute to his retirement pension. He also makes monthly payments into a scheme with the bank that will cover college education for aadya and aanandi. The family’s assests and their lives are insured. Aadya’s parents often remark that because inflation is high they have to be careful with the money and they are. Nevertheless they own two cars; the children attend extra-curricular camps and the family take vacation together every year. Aadya’s father is sure that aadya’s generation will be more prosperous than theirs. Aadya wants to become a doctor.

500 meters away from Aadya’s home lives Rupa. She is about 10 years old, lives with her parents and 5 siblings. The family lives in a two room, small house. Rupa’s father is a daily wage manual worker. Rupa’s elder brother helps his father at the construction site where he is employed. The small cash income that Rupa’s father earns at the end of the day is used to feed the family of 8. In order to supplement their household income, Rupa’s mother works at local grocery store. As she is also responsible for cooking, cleaning and minding the infants her work day usually lasts 14 hours. Despite the long hours it wouldn’t be possible for her to complete the tasks on her own. So Rupa and her older sister help their mother with household chores and mind their young siblings. Rupa’s younger brother attends the local school but neither Rupa nor her older sister has time to enroll there. Her parents can neither write nor read.

Rupa knows that she will be married (in all likelihood to a daily wage manual worker like her father) in about 5-6 years from now and will then liver on her husband’s meager wage. She expects her life to that of her mother.

That the lives of these two girls are enormously different is visible; but girls are intrinsically very similar. They both enjoy playing, eating and gossiping, they are close to their families and they turn to their mothers when in distress, they like pretty things to wear.

In-fact their parents are also alike. They both are knowledgeable about the ways of their world. They care about their families, are always in lookout for ways to increase income & are generally worried about their survival/standard of living.

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Aadya and Rupa cannot vote. But their father’s will vote. While Aadya’s father has the wherewithal to vote for a candidate who he thinks will help India surge on path of development and growth, Rupa’s father is ready to vote for anyone who promises him some instant cash, some instant favor & few evenings full of free drinks & CHICKEN TIKKA.

Is there anything wrong in voting for these reasons; instant cash; quick favor & few evenings full of free drinks and chicken tikka?

Ramlal ‘the capitalist’ is not anarchist, is not a rebel but the one who disagrees with Ramlal’s way of Crony capitalism is an ANARCHIST


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Ramlal ‘the capitalist’ has always existed. Way back in 17th century, Ramlal alias Mr. Ramon sent its first expedition to the East Indies. After some 18-20 months his ship ‘Hector’, he named it after the Trojan prince, returned from Sumatra, Java with a cargo mainly of pepper. The success of this venture led to second and then third and then fourth expedition. Ramlal obviously was not alone. Many other Ramlal’s started investing money in the expectation of making a profit. Profit was quite simple a result of scarcity and distance. Profit was made from the huge difference between the price paid for say pepper in the Spice Islands and price it fetched in say London, a difference that dwarfed the costs of the venture.

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Ramlal ‘the capitalist’ knotted with the state, which granted it a monopoly for the import of goods and gave it the right to export as well. In the exchange the state, always short of money, gained revenue from custom duties on large imports; obviously also through bribes and favors. That’s irrelevant because Ramlal & his friends manipulated the market, (something that Ramlals still practice: remember recent talk about buying country’s gas at 1dollar and selling it at 8 dollar to own countrymen!) but legitimate as per all laws of the land. The secret was to secure monopolies by one mean or another, exclude competitors and control the market in every possible way. (Today’s Ramlal is no different).

As I said Ramlal, ‘the capitalist’ has always existed. Later in the early 18th century Ramlal; now filthy rich started investing in manufacturing; and for the sake of argument (and also basis the Hindi movie that I have seen on Ramlal) started some spinning mill. Obviously, Ramlal made good profits. After some years, markets opened (i.e. other players started investing in this area), and spinning became a very competitive industry. Now profit depended on the workers who turned raw material into finished products. So Ramlal, ‘the capitalist’ started working on wage cost by replacing craft workers with less skilled and cheaper labor. Conflict over wages started. Workers started organizing themselves first locally, then regionally and then nationally. They started calling these groups as UNION. Ramlal’s old ‘friend in deed is a friend indeed’; “state” assisted Ramlal to defeat such Unions. Union Leaders were imprisoned.

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Ramlal then started another form of exploitation; fines, threat of dismissal and at times even physical punishment to enforce discipline. Turning up on time, starting on time & taking breaks of specified duration at specified time became a norm. Ramlal hence safeguarded his profits. Obviously, he was doing it all in a legitimate way.

Ramlal, ‘the capitalist’ is continuing in the most legitimate way of doing business, is accumulating profits & is absolutely within laws of land.

Look at the irony that we live in an illusion that Ramlal ‘the capitalist’ is not anarchist, is not a rebel  but the one who disagrees with Ramlal’s way of Crony capitalism  is an ANARCHIST. Now that’s the definition of capitalism

Why Then?


22nd dec

Portrait of Ramlal’s friend: A successful working woman who was born in a middle class urban family in India’s Capital. She is in her mid 50s right now and is happily married with 2 daughters.

Most of her family members were non- religious. Thus, even in childhood it did not take much effort for her to free herself from the shackles of religion. But Religion is not the only issue that she had to struggle with in an infinitely patriarchal society. As she grew up she was not allowed to do many things that she wanted to do, just because she was a girl. She could not go outside to play cricket or football like her brothers, or swim in a community swimming pool which didn’t had “only female” time slot available. She was not allowed to ride a bike while she always wanted to ride one. As she grew to her teens, her mother was always keeping an eye on her, especially whenever she was talking to a male friend.

It is not that she was not a privileged girl. Her father was an engineer, a rationalist and man of science. He arranged best of education for her. She was the last one to get married among her friends. While almost all her friends married (willfully or because their family wanted them to get married) around the time they reached puberty, she was fortunate enough to complete her graduation before getting married.

She grew up in times when achievement, diligence and toeing the line were regarded as great values. She was an obedient daughter; and turned out to be a successful professional. Her husband supported her in almost all her endeavors (except one when she wanted to go alone on a vacation! God knows why?). He was happy when she gave birth to their twin daughters.  They were forward looking urban middle class couple with two beautiful daughters.

As she grew up, she realized that her religion treats woman as intellectually, morally and physically inferior. Gradually, she realized that it is not only her religion which was overtly gracious towards men; granting all possible rights & freedom, sexual & other pleasures followed by a guarantee of merry-full after-life but it was the case with all religions. And what was the reward for pious woman? Nothing but same old husband promised for next multiple lives!

Last year her elder daughter told her that she wants to marry a professionally successful man whom she first met during her collage days but he is from different religion. She didn’t approve. Her daughter couldn’t understand why? Especially because religion was never important to the family, religion did not give their family any identity, they gave it up a long time ago to say the least.  Why then?

Why then? Any possible answers; why then?

22nd dec 2

“kyon aaya hai be yahan? Tere baap ka ghar hai? Bhag yahan se” (loosely translated in English as: Fu**** why are you here? Fu** off)


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As our car (I was along with my best friend) entered his bungalow I asked my friend, “Do you think he has a pet dog?”

 “Are you afraid of dogs?” he asked

“Not the ones that on the outside resembles Homo sapiens. Over my lifetime I have perfected the art of dealing with that kind. In-fact, as Mark Twain once said, if you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference b/w a dog and man. I know it’s this type that you should be more fearful of but instead I have an abnormal fear for real-dogs”

I resist visiting all my dog owner friends; primarily because, it’s the dog that greets you before your friend & I construe that welcome growl as, “kyon aaya hai be yahan? Tere baap ka ghar hai? Bhag yahan se” (loosely translated in English as: Fu**** why are you here? Fu** off)

So we parked our car, rang the door bell and as expected friend’s pet greeted us. I took a step back; natural extinct prevailing.

“Tiger! My boy… Tiger!” our host came out, sure he meant, “Boy! Don’t worry, no they are no strangers. Don’t worry. I know them”

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Duly chained tiger noticed that his owner himself was taking us inside the bungalow but he continued his welcome growl. I obviously maintained distance.

Tiger seemed to belong to elite kind; he definitely had a greater social status or prestige. I generally get overwhelmed, awed by this special group, its affiliations and practices, its demeanor. Well a friend once told me that in far West, they keep what they call as “The Social Register” which acts as a key resource for identifying individuals that were elite. Tiger seemed one of them.

Sitting in the lawn with friends that evening, looking at “tiger the higher one”, I was feeling a little intimidated. Tiger was on his evening walk. Just about then I noticed two “Street dogs” at the lawn-gate. Intimidated they were, just like me, looking at Tiger’s mannerism & royalty. Tiger, true to his class was invariably ruthless towards these “street dogs”; barking at mere sight.

My friend noticed that I was taking a somewhat keen interest in tiger Vs street dog dual. He said, “This is their daily routine. Every evening when Tiger is on his walk in the lawn, both of them just roam around the gate and stare at Tiger”.

“Humm! But Tiger shouldn’t bark at them. Tiger is upper class Aristocrat, has wherewithal. They are browbeaten oppressed kind. What is tiger going to gain by further intimidating them?”

My friend I think couldn’t understand what I meant. Anyways, that night all three of us (tiger, my friend and I) slept in the lawn. Late in the night I noticed another behavior trait of Tiger, leading me to believe that tiger was actually “Upper class”; a slash below the real “Society group”. What happened in the night was that whenever street dogs growled at a stranger signifying a potential danger Tiger whole-heartedly contributed in their collective growl that slowly increased in intensity and ultimately turned into a howling growl.

But why was Tiger participating? In the evening he was growling at these street dogs; now at the slightest fear of potential danger why Tiger became one of them?

That’s a true “Upper class” trait. A group that broadcast themselves as “Classy”, “higher ones”, “Aristocrat” but at the slightest sense of danger quickly rearrange themselves to where the majority is.

Next evening when we were just about leaving I saw Tiger lying in the corner of the lawn brutally bruise, licking his own wounds. I tried enquiring.

My friend told me that in the evening; inadvertently the main gate was left open. Tiger walked out in the open and those street dogs were anyways on a lookout, they got their chance & rest as you can see.

I looked at Tiger again. Here’s my version of what would have happened that eventful evening.

Tiger would have stepped out of the main gate filled with his fake royalty, would have growled at the “Street Dogs” as usual. Street dogs that day sensing tiger is out of his private zone would have responded saying, “You pretender! You are nothing more than one of us. On the slightest sense of danger you arrange yourself behind us, but otherwise you growl at us.”

Tiger I think would have growled again & that’s when “street dogs” would have given him a ROYAL beating.

I am sure tiger sitting quietly in the corner is brainstorming on where does he actually belong?

Entrepreneur and Entrepreneurship – Question no. 1: Why Ramlal’s mentor is an Entrepreneur?


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“A pressing need would need to be mostly satisfied before someone would give their attention to the next highest need”. Ramlal was introduced to this Hierarchy of Needs by his mentor about 2-3 years back. & this introduction of Maslow was further used to explain why Ramlal’s mentor is an entrepreneur by arguing that, “person’s effectiveness is a function of matching man’s opportunity with his appropriate position of hierarchy of needs.”

Ramlal struggled for some time to figure out what hierarchy of needs is. It is only after some research he figured out that human needs can be arranged in a particular order from the lower to higher. At the lowest level is the basis physiological need. The needs that are taken as the starting point for motivation theory. These needs include things like food, clothing, shelter, air, water and other necessities of life. As soon as the physiological needs are met people want assurance of a given economic level. This comes under safety and security needs; job security, personal bodily security, security of source of income, provision for old age and insurance against risks.

Maslow proposed that the needs have a definite sequence of dominance. Next in the order comes social needs; as man is a social being, he is interested in conversation, sociability, exchange of feelings, companionship, recognition, belongingness.

Once this order is achieved starts needs classified as esteem and status needs. Need also known as egoistic needs. Needs concerned with prestige and status of the individual.

The final step under the need priority model is the need for self fulfillment or the need to fulfill what a person considers to be his mission in life. It involves realizing one’s potentialities for continued self development and for being creative in the broadest sense of the world. After his other needs are fulfilled a man has the desire for personal achievement. He wants to do something which is challenging and since this challenge gives him enough dash and initiative to work, it is beneficial to him in particular and to the society in general. These senses of achievement give him psychological satisfaction

According to Maslow second needs does not dominate until first need is reasonably satisfied and third need does not dominate until first two needs have been reasonably satisfied and so on. The other side of the need hierarchy is that man is wanting animal, he continues to want something or the other. He is never fully satisfied. If one need is satisfied the other need arises. Man lives for bread alone as long as it is not available. But once a need or a certain order of needs is satisfied it ceases to be a motivating force.

It is through this theory that Ramlal’s mentor concluded why he is an entrepreneur. His mentor argued that the once the first four levels are achieved then you feel content. And right after contentment come the highest level which calls for creativity, spontaneity, problem solving and entrepreneurship.

Ramlal then asked his mentor, “Sir, but what are the factors for entrepreneurial motivation?

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Ramlal & Mathematics: horribly anxious moments ahead


23-dec

“I would like to ask you a question that requires an honest answer.” After a pause, Ramlal slowly scanned the faces of ten students enrolled in his recently launched mathematics course. And after the pause Ramlal continued, “How many people in this classroom feel some anxiety about mathematics?”

Not to Ramlal’s surprise after initial hesitation almost all the hands were up. Ramlal said, “Please keep your hand up and look around.  Just notice that you are not alone. There are two subjects that make almost every student anxious – first being mathematics and second foreign language. While most people leave foreign language without attaining fluency, almost everyone fears mathematics & would feel bricks in their pants even if asked what 10% of 30” is?”

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Ramlal continued, “I have spent some time on this fear psychosis & according to me the reason is simple. Whenever you are asked a simple mathematical question your brain tells you, Oh! Shit, not again. This time you will be caught. You will get it all wrong & people sitting around you will boo you. They will see right through you and recognize you as a ‘Duffer.’ May be they will not hoot but will definitely make you feel sick. Better pick a calculator or better just say you don’t know. You can’t learn this. This is too tough.”

So according to Ramlal it is simple; our brain tells us it is Better to be safe than sorry. The other reason, (let me clarify according to Ramlal), why mathematics makes student anxious is because this subject comes around as precise and disciplined step by step stuff to a logical conclusion. You know you can’t have two answers to one question. Mathematics for a huge lot of students is not one of the most creative ventures in the world, with discoveries made by drawing, jotting, erasing, and crossing out pictures. There is nothing that is left to imagination. Almost everything that we have to solve can be solved only one way because it was constructed to give one answer. That’s boring for a huge lot of people. “I know a lot of students who will have, “Maths! Please grow up. How long do you want others to keep on solving your problems”, written on the first page of their mathematics course book” ramlal further added

23- dec 2

Ramlal once asked a student, a not so good in mathematics student, “What goes in your mind when you are in mathematics class?” and student replied, “Ramlal sir, my brain always in the first few seconds concludes that all problems are “Nonsense”. It makes no sense to me to find what the age of ‘bharti’ is if her sister ‘neetu’ is twice as old as she is. Then my brain after a while tells me that if everyone else in the class finds some sense & relevance then it must be something wrong with me. It is at that point that I conclude that I am not good in maths.”

Does mathematics makes you anxious as well? Share a few incidents about your encounter with Mathematics

23-dec 4

Hurray its Election time : Those who do not learn from history are condemned to repeat


 

 

 

 

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Hurray! It’s election time. With farewell to ‘hall of shame – our 15th Lok Sabha’, that’s what the headline in morning newspapers was today; everyone’s getting ready for election. Current Prime Minster being only exception; who perhaps he will retire from active politics now. 

Ramlal who’s a passionate admirer of ‘run-ups to election’ season is a little bemused this time round. Admirer because these run-ups are the only free/easy source of information on what government did & did not do in its 5 year tenure (not all lok sabha lasted stipulated duration though). Incumbents & Challengers both locking horns on almost everything. 

Not that things have changed since 1st lok sabha when (as Ramlal’s great grandfather tells him. Of course he is still alive! He is cursed to live till eternity. Remember the famous adage; those who do not learn from history are condemned to repeat.) JP and Kriplani were critical of INC for moving away from original Gandhian ideals. Ramlal just read that Gandhis are back in action & have joined challenger’s side

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Everyone knows JP & Kriplani lost just like Rajaji lost in 3rd Lok Sabha battle. 

The issues that Rajaji fought against were Incumbent’s policy of license raj. He advocated Free trade. Illusion it was then, illusion it is as this new party is claiming that Incumbent is still being funded by big business houses. 

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The new ideological anarchist who just filed an FIR against ‘Fund-God’ is destined to fall; (remember that adage those who do not….)

How can Ramlal forget the stimulating affect of “Garibi Hatao” (5th Lok sabha) slogan? Incumbent is thinking of a similar stimulating affect this time with “Bharat Nirman” 

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Ramlal voted her to power with thumping majority after listening to “Garibi Hatao. Incumbent is sure “Bharat Nirman” will do the trick this time round. 

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That thumping majority ended in big fall as she emerged as the most corrupt despot we ever saw. Ramlal till date gag about ‘kitchen garden’ and ‘kitchen cabinet’ of the most corrupt despot.  

Ramlal, I hope has learnt from his past (else the adage….. those who do not…)

Halt! Halt! Ramlal now has to get ready for his work. He will be back in his next post where he will talk about 7th to 14th Lok Sabha. 

Disguise : profound way of discovering truth : nearing extinction in today’s democratic societies


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Last night, just like every other night, Ramlal (no not the capitalist or policeman), was reading her daughter a story form the famous Arabian nights.

Harun-Al-Rashid, caliph of Baghdad, reputed to have condemned one of his subject to death, who so charmed him with her stories from evening to evening for thousand nights that he delayed her execution and eventually ended marrying her.

Thousand nights would make approx. 2 years & 7 months. Arabaian night doesn’t elaborate on what happened after marriage. 

Ramlal, however, passed the whole of last night wondering, what would have happened after marriage.  The other known/written fact about Harun-Al-Rashid is that he usually disguised himself as a beggar in order to discover what his subjects were thinking. Ramlal believes that this profound way of discovering truth using tricky ways   would have only come to him after marriage.  

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Authoritarian Harun-Al-rashid is not the only one about whom we have heard using these tricks. There have been others surrounded by the flatterers, who cluster around the absolute power, resorting to multiple ways to understand the real issues of the public.

While despot throughout history have used disguise as a way of discovery, the art seems to be nearing extinction in today’s democratic societies. The only thing relatable about today’s democracies seems to be Chinese adage, ‘dynasties rise and fall but the life of a peasant changes little’.